Anything is Fine!

 

Take one guess as to what sparked this blog! Indecision over the menu! I would never want to be the waiter of a polite group! I might end up waiting forever. When our family goes out, the menu invariably reaches me with a “You order”. Is it because I am a foodie while the others are not? NO. I enjoy food indeed but so does my family. Is it because others in my family are indecisive? Absolutely not! With a majority being fixed signs, most of the family are headstrong with absolutely clear and fixed ideas save for my brother and daughter, who are willing to experiment! Then, why don’t they order? No one wants to hear a “no, not that” every time they open their mouth, perhaps. Do I enjoy it? Of course not! Yet, I cannot stand the ambivalence and I know that the minute I open my mouth and order, the order will be replaced quickly in the way they always wanted it, which would be different from what I had ordered. Then, why on earth didn’t they do so in the first place, you’d wonder!! They were being polite!!!

Credits: healthyplace.com

Seriously, when I see people dilly dallying over simple choices when everyone knows exactly what they want, I get peeved and when they don’t know, I am dumbfounded! Once upon a time I smiled uncomfortably but ageing has taken those charming ways away and I frown, letting my frustration be known. Of course, only within the family! “Which movie shall we watch?” gets an immediate “Anything, you decide” to which you say, “Hindi movie” and hear a “No, English”. Okay “You’ve got mail?” gets a “no romances please and we’ve watched this so many times” to which “okay XYZ then” and this gets a “mmm…anything else?” and after a while you finally, short of pulling your hair apart, say “here’s the choice, why don’t you pick?” and you hear a “Oh no! you choose, anything you want”. No wonder, psychologists and psychiatrists are thriving!!

From picking a shopping mall, to a movie, food, holiday destination, gifting, clothes etc. etc. etc. we are an indecisive lot, aren’t we? I am not indecisive so I get to hear, “Always the same choice” and I end up thinking “at least I have a choice!” The truth is we all do have a choice, but we want to be the bigger person and let the others decide and everyone is wanting to be the larger person. Well, I am large enough so I blurt out what I want just to save time!!

Just think about it, wouldn’t you rather have everyone give their choices from the word go and then do what the majority wants? That way, you remain polite, save time and get going!

Imagine living in a world where you never got to make a choice? There are places and sections in this very world of ours, in the 21^st century, where humans are denied rights, leave alone choices and here you are, empowered and given a choice and you let it pass, to be polite?? Fancy that and be grateful for choices. Only the privileged get to make choices on insignificant things like the menu or the things listed above. If you fail here, I wonder how you would do, on things that matter? If you pass up your choice, someone else will make it for you and slowly, unknowingly, you will give your freedom away.

Every morning you wake up with a choice of being happy or sad, of being empowered or carrying on like sheep, of being mindful or just drifting. It doesn’t end there. When you permit others to make little choices for you due to being polite or busy (Yes! Even that happens!) or apathetic (Oh! I don’t care who is in power- they are all the same!) you are giving away that God’s gift to you of living your life on your terms. And you know what, most of us don’t even see it that way and would react to this blog with a sarcastic “Big deal!” I’ve done that many a time and life seemed a lot more fun that way, I’ll admit. Yet, one day when the choice matters and no one asks you, it hurts. It hurts really bad. You can blame the world for it but it was you all along, giving your power of choice away to be the larger person, to show trust, to be amiable, to be of help to someone and a million of other reasons why!

If you happen to stumble upon this blog, then do take this much with you- let the past go, there is nothing we can do about what’s behind us but make a promise to none other than yourself, that you will mindfully choose every single time you are given an option. The final verdict may or may not go in your favour; you may end up eating Pizza instead of the Biryani you were salivating over because the majority wanted Pizza; that doesn’t matter, exercise that choice, always and every time! And, never feel awkward or sorry about it, even if your choice was against what all the people you care about wanted.